I know that it’s only mid-February … Why am I recapping now? It’s too soon, right? Well … I can tell you that it feels as if I’ve lived a lifetime in this short amount of time already …
February started off so nicely. The first race that I had scheduled, a Super Bowl inspired run complete with miscellaneous football training obstacles, was cancelled. That was fine, it would have been fun to do that, and I was really looking forward to doing it, but it was not meant to be.
My second race scheduled was the “tiny” Smiles Half Marathon in Galt, California. I chose this race because of the fact that Galt is about 20 miles from my house, and it sounded fun. I love little races. However … I completely forgot about this race. I forgot until the Wednesday prior – two days before – to the race that I was scheduled to run! I wasn’t too worried, but it was amusing that I hadn’t thought about it. I remember a time when I worried about running a race two weeks prior, and now it’s as if my body knows what to do with little or no preparation.
Fast forward to the Friday before race day. I’m finishing up working my 12 hour shift, and checking my timesheet to make sure everything checks out so I get paid properly when I get a phone call from my panic stricken husband telling me that our daughter has passed out and is having a seizure! W.T.F!!! I couldn’t comprehend what he was saying, I could only in my mind, see my baby out cold and having a seizure and not knowing how or why. I could only hear a few words that he said – “Passed out,” “Seizure,” and “911.” As a nurse, these are words that I hear on a daily basis. As an ER Nurse, I am able to dissociate myself from all the craziness happening in the ER and go about my life and business as if it were nothing. As an ER Nurse, I am strong and able to handle things, cope well, and separate myself. But when it’s your own … when it’s your very own child (or family member), I am a different person. I am still a nurse, however, I am a nurse who is on the other side of the gurney and no longer in control. No matter how strong I want to be, no matter how composed I want to keep myself, I function differently when on the other side of the gurney. It’s not a nice feeling being vulnerable, unable to separate, unable to put your guard up. It’s hard to be strong when you know that you have to be for your child because you know that if your child sees you freaking out, your child will not fare well in that situation. I can do it for my child, I did it, and my child did well. My child, my daughter knows that I would not let anything hurt her, that I would fiercely protect her. What my child did not know was that inside I was dying. It was heartbreaking to see my Girl laying on the gurney, hurt and afraid. It hurt me to see my husband so afraid, so panicked, so vulnerable. He’s usually my rock, the strong one, but I know that he doesn’t do well when it’s his children. If you thought I fiercely protected my children, HE is and even fiercer protectant! Know that.
When I was able to lay eyes on my Girl, she cried when she saw me, but when I saw that she was upset and fighting … I knew she would be okay. Her CT Scan came back negative, so it’s time for outpatient follow ups to rule out other causes. So you can understand now how one can age many years in the span of a few hours … So far, everything’s good. Thank God.
My husband stayed home with the child on Saturday. I wouldn’t have run had he not been home. Did I feel guilty leaving her? Yes and no. Yes because maybe I should’ve stayed home with her, but no because I knew she was okay. So I headed out to Galt with my friend Anitra. The morning was a super COLD 32 degrees! I laughed at Anitra because she said, “I wanted to be like Row., so I dressed in my shorts and tank top.” I had happened to dress in capris and a long sleeve top … I was not dressed in my normal attire of shorts and tank top. Not to worry, we found her a jacket that she could donate/dump so it worked out well.
I was happy to see that Shiloh came from Sacramento, as well as her friend, Chris, and then my friend, Richelle, came all the way from Fresno. There were, of course, my local friends, Angela, Cres, and Lisa. There was Matt, who was running his first half ever. And … I made a new friend while waiting around the finish line, Mimi. I’ve seen Mimi on my friend Alexis’ page, but had never met her in real life. She is a great gal. Fun, and full of energy! =)
The course of the “tiny” half was thru the residential streets of Galt. Lots of houses, lots of cars, but on the plus side, lots of police patrolling the area and they made good use of their cadets! The water stops were manned by the local Boy Scouts. The only problem that I saw was that there were NO portapotties along the course. (Thank God I didn’t have to go!) I believe that there were a few residents of Galt who were not fond of runners and having their streets blocked, but for the most part, everything went fairly smooth. I had a really good run despite no training at all so I can’t complain. Would I run it again? Yes! As I said, I like small, local races. Other bonuses to this race include having Tony, Fleet Feet owner and Race Director, call your name out while coming into the finish chute, and can’t beat FREE race photos!!! =)
So … I know it’s the middle of February, but it seems like a life time. I have no other races scheduled for the rest of the month and I’m okay with that. Let me just take a breather and let the rest of this month go by uneventfully. I’m okay with that. On a positve note, the Girl celebrates another year on Sunday … Happy Birthday, Grace!!! Mom loves you!
Until next time … Hold your loved ones CLOSE and TIGHT. Never take the time that you have with them for granted. Train HARD and Train SMART. Eat WELL. And … Have FUN. Get out there!!!