It’s week 5, and for me it means that I’m starting over with week 1 of my training plan. It’s kind of hard to explain, but the training plan that I’m using is 18 weeks long, and since I started early (July 1) I was 4 weeks ahead. So … once week 4 was over, I was to start over.
At first I thought that I was being hypocritical by writing this post after I had just posted a blog where I basically said that I was done running for awhile. I didn’t and still don’t want to run “seriously” at this time. But I’m still working out because as I said, I’m not the kind of athlete to just walk away completely. I’m still doing things. I still plan on working hard, just not running hard as I have hung up my running shoes. I think that I got over zealous and put too much pressure on myself with the marathon training and basically petered out.
My last blog post caught the attention of a lot of people. Maybe it was the title, “Hangin’ Up My Shoes.” I don’t know.
A lot of people were worried about me, and wanted to know what happened and why. What can I say? Things happen. Running is such a huge part of my life, but like I said, it’s WHAT I do, not WHO I am. Marathon training is NO joke. It takes up a lot of time and energy. Waking up early to run left me practically listless throughout the rest of the day, leaving me without the needed energy to do much else. I missed my boys baseball games, I didn’t read or play much with my daughter, I still had to work full-time, I couldn’t pick up many shifts at my other job, my husband had to ask for various days off to take me to the races. Mind you, he says that he doesn’t mind, but in a way, I know that he did/does. Then at races, it wasn’t just about running anymore … It was “racing.” I am not a “racer.” I am a runner. Where once running made me happy, it was and is now overwhelming and became more like another job and felt like chore, and I started to resent it. Stepping back was a good choice for me. Once I did, I could feel myself take a huge breath and the weight was somewhat relieved from my shoulders.
I was literally running the San Francisco Marathon last Sunday thinking, “WTF am I doing?” I was running amongst all these individuals who were happy and smiling and excited to be there, and here I was … Debbie Downer, so unhappy, and thinking all these negative thoughts. I imploded. No joke … the bomb went off in the middle of San Francisco. I’m surprised that it didn’t take SF out! It was so loud inside my head, I’m surprised that my head didn’t explode like a pumpkin being dropped from a high rise building! I felt lost. I felt as if I was drowning as all of these thoughts flooded my head. And I wanted to cry. But being who I am, I held it together and finished what I started because Row. does NOT cry!
There were many decisions that needed to be made. The first one was telling my running buddies and my marathon training partners that I would not be proceeding as planned with the training plan for now. I will still run CIM in December, however, I needed a break from the training as I reevaluated how I was going to do this because I really had no clue! Holy cow, how the heck am I going to pull off running a marathon without “formal” training? I think that it is better to take some much needed time off rather than force it because as I was feeling in SF, I know that it would only get worse!
So … here’s a recap of my Week 5 training …
Sunday: 13.1 miles through the streets and Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco. This is the only time I truly lost it.
Monday: I relinquished all expectations and control. I decided that I would no longer do what did not serve me or make me happy. So, in the midst of my Mini Meltdown, I took myself to a local tattoo shop and had a tattoo placed on my wrist to remind me. “Comprometerse.” I love this word, and now it is a permanent part of me. As soon as I got it, I felt an IMMEDIATE inner peace and a calming sensation come over me. My workout for today started as a fluke. I was just going to hop in the pool with my fun-loving kiddos. It ended up morphing into something else … 30 minute “swim” (okay, it was more kick boarding) but I hit 1000 yards! 30 minute spin = 9.5 miles. 3.25 mile walk/”jog” intervals (39 mins). My own Mini Tri. It was fun. No stress.
Tuesday: Rest day.
Wednesday: Rest day. Did a lot of self-care today. I got my eyebrows threaded, and I got an hour massage which was awesome!
Thursday: Triple workout!!! You read correctly – TRIPLE! Workout number 1 – Lower body resistance. Holy mother! Lower body was awesome! Lunges, Squats, Inner/Outer Leg Lifts, Hamstring Curls, Leg Extentions, and Ab Work! Nice! Immediately after came workout number 2, my FAVORITE cardio workout … Awesome workout! Running, Jump Kicks, Burpees, Mountain Climbers, Two Point Burpees, Jacks, and Ab Work! Love it! My trainer, Mikey, ROCKS! He knows how to push me and takes me to puke point. I wasn’t going to stay for yoga, but my friend, Karyn, had asked me, so a third workout it was. I’m glad I stayed. My third workout of the day! Very nice – our instructor made it hard, yet peaceful and relaxing in
the end. It was a nice class, just me, my girl Karyn, and the instructor, Alexis. Loved it. The best part of my day was when I walked through the dojo doors and my friends were all saying that they were just talking about me and asking about me. The people that I work out with at American Martial Arts Academy/Central Valley Krav Maga have dubbed me “Front Row.” I try to encourage everyone that I workout with – EVERYONE. If I know your name, you will hear me call you out in class! I love my peeps! LOVE! I am so thankful that I am able to workout with a great bunch of people!
Friday: I really thought about sleeping in, but decided against it at the last minute. As usual, I do what I always do … I get dressed and I head on over to they gym. If I change my mind when I get there, then I don’t go in, but usually by the time I get to the dojo, which is my second home, I’m
ready to goooooo and get a good workout in whether I’m tired or not. I don’t workout half assed – ever. If I’m there, I give it 110%. Go big or go home! Anyhow, this morning’s workout was done the resistance bands and the ankle straps (sounds like S&M lol)! Push ups, knee raises, lunges, arms, shoulders, abs, running sprints! Damn, I LOVE this workout! So good for my soul! And to think I *almost* slept in …
Saturday: I worked a full 12 hour night shift. Thought about just going home and crawling into bed, but instead decided to get my workout gear on and do a little bit of something first. So a very slow interval run it was. 5-10 min walking warm-up, then I hit the intervals – slow running/even walking at times, then I picked it up, then walked a cool down. Did this for an hour total and hit just about 5.5 miles. Not bad. Got an arm workout in also which is always nice to get some resistance in along with my cardio. On this run I wore my HR monitor and just watched my HR, made sure it didn’t get close to max. It was HOT, but I wanted to get something in and I did.
Those that know me, know that I am not the kind of athlete to just slack. I’ll always do something because it’s just what I do – even when I’m not training for anything. I had a very low stress week and I’m happy that I decided to just lay low and not put any kind of pressure onto myself. I am happy with my decision to stay off Twitter and FaceBook. I did lurk a bit, but did no posting. I did post on my new favorite Google+. It was nice to not hear any “voices” and feel no pressure. All in all, it’s been a great week for me. It seems as if when I just let go and relinquish any and all control that I try to harness, that things just fall into place by themselves. As I said, an immediate inner peace and calm washed over me as soon as I posted that I was hanging up my shoes, and after I got my new tattoo. I’m happy. Thanks for a great week, Week 5. Week 6 comin’ up … You ready for me?