Marathon Training

Marathon Training – Week 2 (Really? Only Week 2?)

R. Wallen, R.N.Leave a comment

So … Here we are in week 2.  So far so good … How many weeks left?  22?  Crud … Just kidding.  Just kidding …  I have nothing to complain about.  I got up and got the work that needed to be done … DONE!

Sunday – I wanted to start my week off on Sunday.  I tried.  I called Cory, but she headed off to beautiful Southern Cali.  Who could blame her?  I’d go to.  So … Instead I just hung around the house and took care of things that needed to be taken care of there.

Monday – Not a bad day.  I got my cross-training in with a kick a$$ workout at AMAA.  Dang … I got my a$$ whopped by Meana  … err .. I mean Nina!  I love Nina!  She really worked my entire body, and I left there dripping with sweat!  I got home, and I headed out for the three mile run that I owed my schedule.  I had a really great run surprisingly.  My calves still ached from my Stadium run last Thursday, but all in all it was a good run.  I know it was just a short run today, but I dedicated it to my friend Rosie’s son, Jesse,  because I had gone to his funeral earlier that day, and spent a few minutes with Rosie.   I thought of him and prayed for Rosie and him during my short run.  RIP, Jesse.

This is the overpass that Judy & I run in Lathrop.

Tuesday – I was going to run the Stadium again with Joe and Becky, however, since I’m running a half on Saturday, and I was still kinda aching from the last time I ran the Stadium … I opted for something that was just a run.  I had asked Joe if he wanted to go, but hadn’t heard, so I called Judy and she’s always willing to run our crazy hill workout with me.  So off we went at 0630 in the morning.  It was a nice and cool morning!  However, for some reason I was “off” and Judy could tell.  She said that my workouts are usually near vomit so for me to be so “blah,” was weird.  She didn’t care though.  We were still out there and we got a good 6 mile run in out there in our small “hill” run … the Lathrop Overpass.  We all have our days, I guess.  It didn’t help that I stayed up until 0300 or so … Nope.  I know better.  That was just stupid!

Wednesday – Kinda took it easy.  I hopped on the spin bike in the morning and got a great ride in.  One hour, easy – just to keep the legs loose and moving.  18 miles, then a three mile run.  Nice brick workout.  Yep … that’s how I roll.  I’m a Brick House … I’m Mighty Mighty … Okay … I’m Mini but MIGHTY.  Never underestimate the power of a very small woman, okay!  LOL.  I know … I’m crazy!

Thursday – Rest day.  I’ve learned that it’s getting harder and harder for me to workout after I work all night.  (I work the night shift, in case you were wondering.)  I wonder how other runners who work night shift do it?  I need to ask this question on Twitter.

Friday – Another rest day.  Yeah, well, rest is training also, so deal with it.

Mac, Me, Judy, & Cory Pre Race!

Saturday – Here we go … Davis Moo-nlight *Almost* Half Marathon.  OMG!  This race was something else!  For one, it started at 7 p.m. which is fine, except it was still 80 degrees and sunny out.  Row doesn’t fare well in heat.  And … And … AND it was one mile short, therefore, I have dubbed it the *almost* half marathon.  It’s all good though.  I had a great time with Cory and Judy, and Cory’s hubby, Sam.  I got to see my girl Mac, and also Mellie Mel (or Big Burt, as Grace calls her).  I remember from February’s Davis Half Marathon that I HATED Davis’ crazy tunnels!  Yeah, well, I *still* hate them.  Not sure if I’ll run that one again, or if I’ll ever run in Davis again.

So … That’s Week 2 in a nutshell.  What I’ve learned is that I don’t fare well with little sleep … Um … DUH, Row.!  Where have I been?  Seriously, it’s just harder for me to recover when I work a full weekend – 12 hour night shifts x 3 days … I know that rest is an important aspect of training.

I pulled out my new Saucony Triumph 8s to start training in them this week.  They’re my work horse shoes … and I have found that they are NOT very nice to my ankles.  I ran the half in them and could hardly walk afterwards!  I was walking with a lot of pain to my left ankle, and my gait was severely off.  No plantar fascitis pain to my feet, thankfully!  I spent 1.5 hours with the H-wave on my ankles and feet, then wore my compression stockings to help recover.  I wonder if you can O.D. on too much electrical stimulation?  Oh well, let me tell you, it worked like a charm!  No pain.   I’m not sure what to do about my shoes though.  I may just train in my Triumph 8s and run in my Kinvaras.  I need to figure it out retro STAT!

Next week, I need to see my favorite Chiropractor on Monday and get adjusted.  I plan to focus on core get some resistance training in there along with all the cardio that I’ve been doing.  May be a *little* bit of a challenge since I’m on VACATION!!!  We’ve got 2 birthdays to celebrate:  my son’s 21st birthday, and my hubby’s initiation into a new decade!  LOL!  Happy *almost* Birthdays to my guys!

I know that my exterior is “hard,” but really there’s a real live, caring person underneath.  I’m just not one to let my guard down and show much emotion.  I’m always asked what I think about when I run?  Honestly, it’s my church.  I think a lot, and I spend a lot of time reflecting and in prayer.  I talk to God a lot.  Not just asking Him to help me get through this run or that run either.  Although a lot of is is wondering about all that,  I had more pressing matters at hand.  This was a week filled with emotions, and I had a slightly heavy heart as I prayed for my friend.  You see, I DO believe in God, and I know that there’s always a reason, but sometimes … sometimes the reasons are difficult to accept.

Have a great week, everyone!  Remember that life is good.  Hug your loved ones a little tighter, and remind them that you love them because you just don’t know.  I’m thankful to my hubby who puts up with my insanity and OCD, and to my kiddos who hold my heart in their hands.  And I’m thankful to my friends who run with me and accept me as I am.  =)

Marathon Training – Week 1 – Done!!!

R. Wallen, R.N.Leave a comment

It’s been a rough week for me, add on the start of my marathon training and it kind of compounded it … but … but … but … I was able to chuck most of the excuses and get the required work DONE!!!

I like the schedule that I devised because it offers me a lot of leeway. I’m basically following Hal Higdon’s Novice 2 Training Plan, but I added my own Row. Flair into it. You know what that means … It means prepare to suffer, Sucka!

So … Week One went down like this …

Cory & Row. Day 1. DONE!

Sunday – My buddy, Cory, wanted to start our training off right. So … she suggested that we run early in the morning … at 0630 on Sunday. What?!? She wants to kill me even before we “really” get started. Seriously? 0630? She had things to do earlier that day, and here in Stockton it gets HOT earlier and earlier. So … okay. I get up and meet her at 0630. As much as I wanted to sleep in, as much as I am so NOT a morning person … I wake up and meet Cory at 0630 and off we go. 5 nice, easy miles … DONE! We did a nice out and back in her neighborhood of Spanos Park – down Whistler, up on the levee, and back up Whistler … Perfect.

Monday– The schedule calls for 3 miles. I’ve got the FireCracker 4 Miler planned that Fleet Feet puts on every year.

Mama & Grace! Fireworks! Boom!

Perfect. So I drag my family out to Grupe Park and I get my daughter, Grace, to run the kids run. She has a blast! Me, I take off for the 4 miler shortly after. Whoa, it was HOT and it was only 0800! It slowed my time down, but it was about time on my feet, so I took it for what it was, and was happy with my performance.

Tuesday – Was supposed to run 3 to get the beginning of the week done, instead I did core and skipped the run. I know, I sound as if I’m making excuses, but I was tired.

Wednesday – I have a lot of cross training mixed in my plan. Today would be no exception. I went to Krav Maga. I love Krav Maga. I’ve been doing it since 2001 … I’ve been a member of Chris Ost American Martial Arts/Central Valley Krav Maga since then. I’ve taught Cardio Kickboxing, and I have a Black Belt in Krav Maga. This workout is like no other. Seriously, it’s the BEST cross-training workout EVER and I love it there!

60 up ... 60 down!

Thursday – Joe Rodhe and Becky plan to run the Stadium Stairs. But then they don’t, then they do … so we plan on 0630. Another early day, but I’ll do it because Joe and Becky have graciously agreed to help me, to push me, to encourage me. Ugh, but 0630? Really?! Really! I find an opening in the fence and crawl through, and it’s on … 60 up, 60 down. 60 up, 60 down! Joe started earlier than me, so while he waited for me, he does lunges as I die at the top. I refuse to give up, I finish all of them! 1.9 miles of stairs, and a little bit of a slow run to cool down to make it a little over 2 miles. I get home in time to plan and make dinner, have breakfast, then head off to Spinning with Rodger at InShape. 21 miles on the spin bike! Yee Haw!! Check! Check! Check! =)

Friday – Rest Day. Should’ve ran my long run here, but my partner bailed (it’s okay, Cor), so I opted to rest and run in the morning …

Saturday – Long run … 8 miles on the schedule. I worked a long 12 hour night shift, and I was tired, but I got it done with a one mile walking cool down to my car. I busted it out and did what I needed to do. DONE!

There you have it. My week in a nutshell! Big thanks go out to my running partner, Cory, and to my two a$$ kickers err … motivators, Joe and Becky. They are kind enough to keep me on track and kick my butt when need be!

This week, my good friend, Rosa, lost her young son, Jesse, in a tragic motor vehicle accident. If I thought that my week was rough, my Rosie has had a much rougher week. I could not imagine her pain and suffering, I can only believe it to be an unbearable kind of pain. Rosa has been my friend for a long time. She has been my Muddy Buddy partner for 2 years now, has done Krav Maga with me, and she has trained with me on numerous occasions. I love my Rosie, and I pray for her and her family that God will be with her and ease her pain. My “rough” week pales in comparison, I will not complain. I will run without complaint, and hug my children a little tighter than usual. Thank you, God, for blessing me with Rosie’s friendship. I pray for the health and safety for my children, for all children, please watch over them as I know that I know that I cannot bubble wrap them, just please keep them safe as I love them so. Thank you, Lord. And, Rosie, if you’re reading this, know that I love you dearly … always have … always will.

Today starts another week, but we’ll start tomorrow. I’ve got another wild week planned out. I’m ready for Week 2 … are you?

Here We Go Again … Marathon Training Starts NOW …

R. Wallen, R.N.Leave a comment
This Is MY Strong from Saucony by Row. I LOVE THIS!!!

It’s hard to believe – kind of – that marathon training started again for me today.  I still can’t believe that I was dumb enough to sign up to run another marathon, especially when openly stated at the last one I ran that, “I am NEVER running one of these effing things ever again!!!”  Okay, never mind that I said that 2 times before also.  But seriously, what the heck was I thinking?  I wasn’t thinking.  When I signed up for CIM (the California International Marathon), I remember that I got kind of to the end of the registration and I thought it would ask me, “Are you sure?  Are you really sure?”  It didn’t.  The next page just said, “Congratulations, you are registered!”  Wait!  Whaaaaat?  Dang.  I’m not one of those girls who’ll let their hard earned dollars go down the drain so … There’s NO backing out now.

This is a *small* pile of my running reading ...

Five months.  I’m giving myself FIVE  L O N G months to get my legs, my body, my mind into top condition to get this done.  I’m taking my time.  It’s going to be a little bit different this year.  This year I’m training without a coach.  Last year was the only year that I trained with a coach.  My training in previous years were haphazard as I had absolutely NO clue what I was doing, and I thought that just running would be enough.  This year, I know a little bit.  I read a few books, looked up a few plans, then grabbed my calendars and I put together a crazy little plan of attack for me.  Then I set some goals, and decided I’m going for it.  I’m going to do the best that I can, and along the way I am going to illicit the help of several people – although they don’t quite know it yet.

My feet getting H-Wave Therapy! Can you hear them sighing relief?

This year I’m gonna make sure my body is taken care of.  That means seeing my favorite Chiropractor, Dr. Brian Crawford, every month or more if needed.  I’ve also lined up a masseuse – kind of.  I bought a whole bunch of  Groupons to various massage therapists, and I have a few thatMy Sauconys! My feet LOVE these shoes! were given to me as gifts.  I’m going to make sure that my feet are WELL taken care of – that means H-Wave therapy, foot massages, A.R.T., orthotics, ice, training in the “right” shoes which for me are Saucony Triumphs and Saucony Kinvaras, and getting physical therapy.  I’m going to eat right 75 – 80% of the time.  I know that I can’t be 100% and I’m not going to lie.  I love my occasional pastry – this is part of taking care of my body, right?  NOT everyday, just enough to satisfy the cravings when I have them.  I’m going to cross train – with my favorite Krav Maga, spinning with Rodger,  resistance train – with P90X, or at the gym.  I’m gonna work my core until it’s just about shredded!!!  I got my Twitter posse – so many to name, and my Local Girls – Mac, Mel, Cory, and Judy – who are all running CIM with me – to hold me accountable.  And I’m going to read, write, talk running to whoever will listen …

Am I ready?  I’m ready to start training.  As far as the marathon goes … I’ve got time.  But we all know that time just flies when we’re having so much FUN!!!  I’m going to do this.  You know me … Once decided, I will find a way, any way, to get it DONE!

Cory and I - Day 1. 5 miles. DONE!

Anyone care to join me on this crazy adventure?  I can assure you that it will be a wild and fun-filled ride … Com’mon … Who wants to put in some serious mileage?  Let’s goooooo … !!!

While I Am Running …

R. Wallen, R.N.Leave a comment

 

26.2 miles long, that dead ends into a wall!!!

 

When I’m out there getting my runs in, most times I can be found running alone.  When the mileage is high, I am one of those runners that needs to talk herself through the miles … and it better be positive talk also, otherwise I’m doomed!  Lucky for me, I’m a fairly positive person who can see more good rather than impending doom.

I am a lover of quotes and great sayings.  What follows is a compilation of some of my favorite quotations and sayings that have gotten me through many miles.  Feel free to comment and add your own …

I know I am only competing with myself.
I set goals and work hard to accomplish them.
I understand the power of the human will.
I know I can face whatever road lies ahead.
I am not satisfied with the status quo.
My true self shines through.
I AM A MARATHONER.

In accordance with the prophecy, I will go the distance. XXVI.II

26.2 – I am not afraid.

Ask your Doctor if getting off your ass is right for you.

The triumph of will over reason.

There will be days when I don’t know if I can run a marathon.
There will be a lifetime of knowing that I have.

Curso, ergo sum … I run, therefore, I am.

The pain is temporary.  The pride is forever.

In my mind, I am a Kenyan.

Surgeon General Warning:  Lack of physical activity is hazzardous to your health.

The miracle is not that I finished.
The miracle is that I had the courage to start.
– John Bingham

Make friends with pain and you will never be alone.

Time is not on your side: Out run it as long as you can.

Time is always running.  Are you?

Run like hell and get the agony over with.

The greatest pleasure in life is doing the things that people say we cannot do.

Training: It’s not a matter of life or death.  It’s more important than that.

Always focus on what you CAN do, not what you can’t.

Define what victory means to you as individual, then proceed to measure your success by how close you come to it.

What’s lost by not trying and what’s lost by not succeeding are two VERY different things!

Trust the power within you and use it.  When you don’t, that’s when fear sets in …

When your legs are tired, run with your heart.

Dead Last Finish is greater than Did Not Finish, which trumps Did Not Start.

Good things come slow – especially in distance running. – Bill Dellinger

Human beings are made up of flesh and blood, and a miracle fiber called courage. – George S. Patton

I have met my hero, and (s)he is me. – George Sheehan

Running is a big question mark that’s there each and every day. It asks you, “Are you going to be a whimp or are you going to be strong today?” – Peter Maher

Runners just do it – they run for the finish line even if someone else has reached it first.

If you are going through hell … keep going … – Winston Chruchill.

All it takes is all you’ve got.

The real purpose of running isn’t to win a race, it’s to test the limits of the human heart. – Bill Bowerman

Games require skill. Running requires endurance, character, pride, physical strength, and mental toughness.   Running is a test, not a game.  A test of faith, belief, will, and trust in one’s self. So hardccore that it needs a category all to itself to define the pain.   When game players criticize, it’s because they aren’t willing to understand, not because they’re stronger.  Running is more than a sport, it’s a lifestyle. If you have to ask us why we run, you’ll never understand, so just accept.  – Jessica Propst

Brick walls are there for a reason.  They let us prove how badly we want things. – Randy Pausch

Now, if you are going to win any battle you have to do one thing.
You have to make the mind run the body.
Never let the body tell the mind what to do.
The body will always give up.
It is always tired in the morning, noon, and night.
When you were younger the mind could make you dance all night, and the body was never tired …
You’ve always got to make the mind take over and keep going.
– George S. Patton

And, last, but not least … “You Got This!”

Bobbing Headlights – Modesto MN Half Report

R. Wallen, R.N.Leave a comment
MACHine and MiniRowRow

It was our “Runniversary,” Mac and I.  We ran the Inagural Modesto Midnight Half last year as our first year together, and decided that we would run it again this year.  I love that Mac and I run together virtually.  We live not “that” far apart (1.5 hours), however, it’s not easy for us to just pick up and drive to where the other is to run.  We check up on each other via text messaging and FaceBook, and have started running one half-marathon every month together beginning this year.

Where to begin … It wasn’t a bad race, just more things that need to be ironed out.  Not very many people found it easy to run in the dark, and found the race very unorganized.  True, it’s night and it’s dangerous, but it’s a chance that we take when we sign up for a race like this.

I, myself, enjoyed the course this year.  Last year was two dark loops of the same route.  BAD as some of it was in a dark, very DARK area of Modesto that was NOT in a good area.  This year, the course was one big loop.  I don’t like running loops myself, so to only have to run one big loop was a big plus for me.  The darkest part of the course was around mile 5-6ish  – which was behind the high school.  There were street lights that were there, but for some reason, maybe budget issues, these lights were not turned on.  That would have solved some of complaints right there as that section of the run was PITCH BLACK.  Even with those of us wearing headlamps, it was not enough to light up a good section of running path.  I could see enough in front of me to know where to step, but seriously, someone could get injured there easily as it was too dark.

Dark Street + Unclosed Road To Traffic = Potential DISASTER!

Complaint #2 – the roads were NOT closed to traffic.  Let’s see … dark route + traffic = very HIGH potential for disaster (i.e. runner v. vehicle).  Not good.  Granted, the Modesto Police Department was out in full force, and stopping traffic for the runners where traffic was high, however it was NOT a great idea to just have cones blocking a lane of traffic for runners.  That was not fun.  Worrying about running in the dark is bad enough, but to have to worry about the potential for getting hit by a car increases ones anxiety ten-fold!  Not cool at all.

Complaint #3 –  There was a lack of aid and water stations.  At mile 3, Mac and I saw a man down, surrounded by his family as I heard one of them ask, “Dad, can you hear me?”  Mac had asked if someone had called for EMS, but they appeared slightly confused and finally answered that they had and waved us on.  We continued on with our run, but worried in the back of our minds that something serious had happened to that gentleman as he did not look well at all.  As far as water stations, there were water stations at every 2nd mile or so starting at about mile 4, I believe.  However, at the mile 6 station, there were only 5 – 5 gallon water jugs and when Mac asked if there was water, the girl standing close by said, “Uh, yeah … you can fill up your water here.”  It was then that I pointed out to Mac that they were 5 gallon jugs and started laughing!  We carry our own water when we run, but Mac had depleted her bottle and she needed more.  I guess I just didn’t drink mine all yet, however when we came back around to the station there were attendants there who were diligently filling up cups and handing them out.  Mac was able to refill her bottle, and I grabbed a cup to cool myself off as I doused it on the back of my head and back.

The weather was awesome.  Probably around 66ish, with clear skies.  The moon was incredible, but NOT enough to light up any path as the event organizers had hoped.  As I am a nocturnal being, this was okay with me.  I function well at night and in the dark which is probably one reason why I did well.  With that said, the remainder of this blog will be on how I felt during this race.

Linda and the very cool sign she made for me.

 

Last year I finished the half in 2:26:xx.  This year, I finished in 2:12:xx, an improvement of 14 minutes!  My instructions for this race were as follows:  3mile warm up, race the Half,  2mile cool down.  What?  I have to run before and after?  Are you kidding me?  No, Coach Speedy Sasquatch was NOT kidding.  Okay, I do as instructed so I tell Mac the plan and we hit it.  We run the 3 mile warm up in about 30 minutes with enough time to gear up to run the Half.  As we are gearing up, I get a call from my friend Linda (@MsV1959) and she tells me that she’s at the Modesto Centre Plaza and come meet her.  It was so nice to see Linda and to finally meet another Twitter friend, Laura (@NICURNMama)!  Linda had made a sign for me that sincerely touched my heart!  No one had ever done that for me before and it made me happy to see it!

In the beginning, I thought that the 3 mile warm up would be a disadvantage to me.  I believed that I would be tired from it and that I wouldn’t perform well.  In actuality, it did not hinder my performance at all.  I didn’t feel tired throughout the race.  I did hear my head try to tell my body that it was tired, but I told my head which told my body, “There’s nothing wrong with you.  Nothing.  Your breathing is even and non labored.  Your shoes fit and your feet don’t hurt.  You’re hydrated.  Your stomach doesn’t hurt.  There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with you, so GO!”  And I went.  There were a few times when my body wanted to falter and slow down, however I would repeat the mantra again to myself and my body believed it and kept going.

I was happy to be running well.  My last half (July) was a disaster and I thought that I was done running then!  “Trust the training,” was my other mantra of the night.  I have to say that I am thoroughly enjoying working with Speedy Sasquatch!  He’s been awesome in getting my plans out to me, and answering my gazillion questions and concerns.  He is a great motivator and cheerleader, and I like that in my Coach!

Linda, Mac, & I =) The Headlights Work!

Despite all of its issues, I still feel that this event could be a really great event.  I know that running in the dark is not for most people.  I enjoyed it.  And as usual, I enjoyed running with Mac.  I loved how people really went with the theme of lighting themselves ups.  If we decide to run this again next year, I am sure that we will also plan to light ourselves up with strings of lights, etc.  We were thankful to gotten some really cool headlamps that my hubby, Chris, was thoughtful enough to get for us … it was fun watching my headlamp and the headlamps of those who ran with me bob up and down making for some really interesting shadows.  Will I run it again next year?  Most likely, yes.  As I said, I enjoyed the course, and I do enjoy running in the dark.

I know that this post is 1.5 months late … It had been written almost immediately, however, as I’m new to blogging, I had to figure out how to add pics, and etc.  I told my son that I was probably too old to be doing such a thing as blogging, but it’s kinda fun, and I LOVE reading what everyone else posts.  I’m not a natural storyteller, I’m more of a rambler … and have a tendency to drone on and on …

***Oooooh … Update on the gentleman that went down at mile 3.  He’s fine.  He said that he had been running, felt a little dizzy, and that’s all that he remembered!  He was VERY fortunate in that there was a doctor who happened to be running behind him who witnessed the entire scene and was able to render actual CPR.  The gentleman was transported to a local ER, then transferred out and had a pacemaker placed!  Geez!  He was all smiles and said to be doing well for the interview for the paper!  I’m happy for him!  Thank God!

Layin’ Low

R. Wallen, R.N.Leave a comment

It’s 7 days until D-Day … just seven.  It’s hard to believe that it’s all come down to this.  It seems as if April was just yesterday.  I feel as if I need more time.  I need more training.  I need to shed a few more pounds.  But … I only have seven days.  I would say “one week,” but that makes it seem that much closer.

All I want to do is hide.  I don’t care to interact much with anyone, and I’m happy to have the rest of this time off of work.  I don’t care to talk to anyone about how I think I’ll do, or what my goals are.  Really, all I want to do is hide out.

Truth is, I’m sacred.  I don’t feel ready.  Yes … I have been training.  Yes, I have put in the miles.  Yes, I have worked hard.  Yes, I could have done better, trained harder, ate better, taken better care of myself,  whatever … it’s too late now.  I’m done.  This is what it has come down to, and I’m scared out of my mind.

People say, “You got this, Row.  You know what to do.  You know what to expect.”  Yes, I have run a marathon before, however, this is the first marathon that I will be running with ACTUAL training, and I really don’t know what to expect.

I’ve been asking other endurance athletes and runners for words of wisdom and advice to keep the motivation up when your body is just screaming at you to, “STOP!”  And I am thankful to everyone who answered me.  I’m not trying to flood my head with everything, just taking bits and pieces of some great advice and filing it away.  But I’m still scared.

I need this time to lay low and hide out just to tune out what everyone else is doing and focusing on.  I need this time to just find me, and figure out what I need to do to get through this.  I believe that I CAN do this.  I have put in the time, the training, and the miles.  I have mental toughness, and perseverance.   I have finished a marathon before.  I am strong.  I am able.   I can do this.  I CAN do this.  I will do this.  I’m okay.

Deep breath, Row.  Deep, deep breath.  Breathe.  Believe.

I got this … just let me hide out for a couple more days.  I’ll be okay.  Whatever happens, I know that I WILL BE AMAZING!

Keeping My Head Screwed On Straight

R. Wallen, R.N.Leave a comment

Over the last few weeks, I’ve had a lot of realizations.  Well, that’s partly true … what I’ve really had were wake up calls.  Realizations, wake up calls, same thing.  My head hasn’t been screwed on straight – it’s been bobbling and at times hanging on by a mere thread.  That’s crazy, because I keep thinking that if I could just run like a chicken with its head cut off, then there would really be no problem.

I think too much … that is my problem.  I’ve been told by my husband, and countless people that I just think too much.  Things that should be easy and mundane, I end up over-thinking and screwing it all up!  I’m one of those people who are wound up pretty tight ’cause I get myself all worked up over nothing.  I sit here and try to control everything, when in reality, I can’t because it’s impossible.  And some days, with all that’s floating in my head, I can’t think … because I can’t focus … because I’m worried about too many things!

I try … I really try to just let go … but even so, I still have some hold of the reins just not so tightly.  Truth be told, it’s when I’m not thinking that things work out best, but no matter how many times I tell myself that, I don’t remember.  I forget and worry myself to death.

As my marathon training comes to a close (kind of, I’ll still be training, just not for a marathon) and the actual marathon comes to reality, my thoughts jump from one thing to another.   I wonder if the goals and expectations that I set for myself are too high.  I worry that I won’t finish in a “decent” time.  I think that I’ll look “slow” to everyone.  I wonder why I even signed up for another marathon.  I ask my self, “What am I trying to prove?”  I worry about injuries, dehydration, nutrition.  Did I put enough miles in?  Did I train enough?  Will my shoes and inserts fail me?  All these swirling questions, making me dizzy, driving me crazy!!!  If I ever needed a Calgon moment, it’s now!

I have been working frantically to get my head screwed on straight, using every kind of screw, nail, brace, and glue to do so.   I’ve been mostly worried about looking stupid and making a fool out of myself, when what I should be doing is praising myself and giving myself lots of props for even having the courage to run a marathon.  I am reminded that the race is not against others, the “real” race is within myself.  I am only racing against myself.   There are only a handful of people who truly care, and everyone else could care less about how I do, or how fast I finish.  At the end of the race, I will receive the very same medal that all of the other finishers receive. 

I know that I’m not the only one out there worrying and making a mountain out of a molehill.  I’ve come so far, and I have trained and worked so hard.  In my head, I know that I can do this.  In my heart, I believe that it’s possible.  But right now those moments are fickle – they come, stay for awhile, then they disappear, then I panic, calm myself down, and start all over.  I feel almost bipolar, riding an emotional roller coaster!  Aaaagggh!  For now, I sit tight, meditate, take some deep breaths and just believe … I breathe in faith, and exhale fear …

I am thankful to the individuals who have taken the time out to listen to me whine, and help me to set my head straight.  My hubby who listens to me as I allow the craziest of thoughts to escape from my mouth, who assures me that I’m going to be okay, and who believes in me wholeheartedly.   I’m thankful to my Coach @speedysasquatch who reminds me that he can help me expose my running talent, who gives me my plan and holds me accountable for my training.  My Twitter posse  and my running peeps who help keep me reeled in, and help squash the self-doubt, and help me to see ME! 

Two and half weeks left … one last long run, then it’s taper time …

Priceless

R. Wallen, R.N.1 Comment

Running … It’s supposed to be “free,” right?  You’d think it would at least be cheap or inexpensive, but in reality it’s not.

If you just get out and run, just run, then, yes, it’s free.  You don’t worry about anything … you just get out there or jump on a treadmill and go.  But once there’s an inkling that you want to get serious, this is where things can get a little pricey.  Let’s see …

Good shoes, not just any old pair of shoes that you can pick up at the local department or sporting goods store.   You have to remember that your feet take the bulk of the pounding and stress when you are run running.  They deserve protection.  They deserve to have some good money spent on them.  Spend the time to get your gait analyzed so you know which shoe is best for you.  Try them all on and make sure they’re comfortable.  And when you find that perfect pair, getting a second pair is suggested when you’re really putting the mileage in.

Inserts are necessary for some runners like me who have issue with their feet such as plantar fascitis.  Sometimes, the inexpensive inserts will work well, but with the mileage that I put in and the degree of my injury, the inexpensive inserts were not the best choice for me.  Inserts can range in price, and must be researched well in order to find the perfect fit just as shoes.

Running attire – sure, running really doesn’t call for special attire if you’re just going out for a jog, but if you’re a serious runner, you know then that cotton is rotten, and some articles of clothing don’t make the best running attire.  Take into consideration the weather, sweat factor.  Dri fit is not cheap.  When it’s raining, you need a jacket.  Hats for sun and protection.  Special socks that don’t cause blisters.  Sports bras that hold boobs into place and provide support.  Shorts for the summer.  Capris or long tights for the cooler weather.  Compression socks for recovery.  Compression gear for maximum performance.

Body Glide to help prevent chafing.  Sunblock for obvious reasons.  Lip balm.  Tape for muscles, like my favorite RockTape.

Special GPS watches – if you’re serious about tracking your runs.  Maybe a heart rate monitor.

Gym memberships for those that don’t have access to a treadmill, and for workouts that need to be done aside from just running.

iPods to provide you with music for your run.  Don’t forget headphones – may they be wireless or corded, finding the right ones can prove to be a challenge.

Nutrition – not just what you eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.  But actual nutrition for your run – Gu, Power Gels, Gatorade, Powerade, protein shakes, and whatever else you may want to eat while you’re out there for hours at a time. Remember that as an athlete, you must fuel your body with good nutrition for breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks.  Supplements may be required to assist in meeting our nutritional goals.

Doctors and Chiropractors that keep us healthy and able to run.  They can be costly, but so worth it.  Massage Therapists or a masseuss to knead the kinks out and keep our muscles supple.  Foam rollers, ice packs, muscle rubs, ace wraps … don’t forget to add those in.  Unfortunately, for some, physical therapy is needed to aid in recovery from serious injuries.

Books and magazines to learn about your sport.  Library is cheap and free, and so are articles on the internet.

Race fees – once you get serious, it’s good to have a goal and signing up for a race is a good way to keep on track by training for your goal.  Remember to factor in the cost of travel and sometimes lodging to run these races.

Coaching and training plans for those of us who need to be directed and guided, and kept accountable.

Ah … so many things to consider.  It’s such a great sport and it’s all worth it.  When it comes right down to it, it’s all worth the monetary cost that I put into it.  But the payment is more than just monetary … the payment comes in the form of the time that is paid when putting in training, the blood, sweat, and tears!  I know that there is more to it than just lacing up a pair of shoes and going out running …  All this, to me, is worth it.  I am thankful and blessed to be able to afford what I can.  I believe that what I get out of the sport far exceeds any monetary cost that I must pay.  There is so much that a monetary value cannot be placed.  The friendships that I have made.  The feeling of accomplishment that I get from completing a race.  All of it is priceless …

The Mileage Gets Longer and L O N G E R

R. Wallen, R.N.Leave a comment

Marathon training isn’t easy.  It begins with a crazy idea to run a marathon that eventually takes on a life of it’s own once that decision is made and the race is chosen.  One has to find training plan, and stick to that plan.  It takes dedication and requires a lot of hard work which includes payment in the form of blood, sweat, and tears.  It is challenging physically, but EXTREMELY challenging mentally … because it’s more than just running.  Anyone can say that they could run a marathon, but will they actually make it to the finish?

Although I have been a runner for many years, it is only in the last few years that I have become a “serious” runner.   I joke that I am in constant, perpetual training as 2010 is the year that the most mileage has been hit every month.   With a half-marathon every month, there is no room for slacking off.  Put the mileage in and get the work done.

As I really have NO clue as to how to properly train for a marathon, in February, I began researching the option of getting a coach.  It’s one thing to download a plan and follow it.  It’s another to have a real, live coach giving me actual direction.  I found a few, sent out a couple emails, and choose one which I thought was a good fit.   My requirements were direct and to the point:  1. My training plans have to work around my life and my schedule; 2. I need someone to hold me accountable; 3. I need someone to engage me; and 4. I prefer not to have my training plans given to me all at one time.  Easy, right?  Apparently, too easy.  In June, my coach sent me my training plans for my NWM training up until the day of the marathon!  Noooo!  I can’t have plans like that.  First off, I have a somewhat confusing working schedule.  And secondly, as I perused the *entire* schedule, it caused me to panic as anxiety and self-doubt set in!!!  As if that were not bad enough, I don’t hear from my coach again.  I saw him online a couple times, and I sent him a message that said, “Say, ‘Hi, Row., how is your training?'”  So he asks.  I shouldn’t have to ask.  You are my coach … you should be on me everyday!!!

Ah … but that’s old news already.   I have a new coach.  I have a better coach who gives me a weekly plan, is accessible, answers my questions, quells my fears, helps squash my self doubt, but best of all, holds me accountable for my workouts.  I like my new coach.  it’s only been a month, and I can see that I have improved tremendously since signing on.  However, the mileage is getting longer … and L O N G E R …

Duh, Row.!!!  You are training for a marathon!  It is expected that the mileage will get longer, but thinking about it makes me queasy and puts me in a state of discombobulation as my mind spins in circles trying to wrap my head around the idea.  It’s crazy because I know that I can run a marathon.  At this point there are 6 weeks left until NWM!!!  SIX! I have to get the mileage in.  I need to get the mileage in.  I have NO excuses.  If I want to do well, if I want to improve … and I DO … then I have to suck it up and do the work.

So I run.  I follow the instructions and the plan, and I run.  Intervals, tempo, mile repeats, long runs, hills.  As the mileage increases, so does my need to find the time to run for hours, as well as my need for good, restful sleep, and intake of extra calories.  It took me awhile to figure this out as I often found myself exhausted, or in the middle of a hypoglycemic episode at the *wrong* time!

I have been working hard at getting more sleep in … but it’s a little difficult as I am a true nocturnal being.  I work at night, and sleep during the day.  Makes for a weird training schedule as I don’t have “normal” hours.  Some nights when I know that I should be sleeping, I’m not.  Instead, I’m messin’ around on the computer – Facebook or Twitter are the two places that I troll around and lurk the most.  Either that or I’m trying to catch up on housework, or whatever else needs to be done.  It’s so hard for me to just “turn off” and go to sleep.

Eating has been a challenge as well.  I’ve had a few hypogylcemic episodes because of this lack of intake – once was at work, as I was rendering patient care.  I know I freaked that patient out as I turned pale, began sweating profusely, and damned near DFO’d (done fell out)!  In my head, I know that I need to eat.  I know that I need extra calories.  I have to remember to feed myself.  When I don’t do it correctly, I tend to eat all the “wrong” things.  I need to get this right more than any other part of my training.  This has been the most difficult to correct.  I need to learn about slow burning carbs – but I despise oatmeal’s texture.  Gah!  In the meantime, I eat, albeit it’s more like force-feeding myself, and I gag the entire time!  I have been told that I am “fueling an athlete’s body.”  Therefore, I should feed it right!  I know, I know!

I countdown, and I panic at times as I realize that time is moving so quickly towards the day of the marathon … when I know that I shouldn’t.  In my mind, I know that I have time.   My Coach reels me back down to reality …  Focus on the now … Focus on the now … No countdowns.  Just focus on what’s happening now … day by day.  Look no further than what’s at hand.  I will eventually get to “D” day, but for today, I will get the work done, and look no further than what’s on my schedule for today.

37 days left … Time to go get the work done, put the mileage in, ’cause these miles ain’t gonna run by themselves!!!  See you at the finish line!

Running For Dad

R. Wallen, R.N.Leave a comment

Life changes you when someone close to you dies.  It’s almost as if in some way, somewhere deep down inside of you dies with them, but in another way, it’s as if a part of you awakens.  To some, that awakening may not be noticible because of the fact that life just gave them this terrible blow and they believe that somehow it would be “wrong” for them to live life when their loved one just died, therefore, that little flame that may have sparked an awakening gets extinguished.  Many people are like that after someone they loved passes – they feel guilty for being alive, for being happy, for moving forward.  Here’s my take.  Here’s what I believe.  I believe that those that have died would NOT want us to be guilty.  I believe that they would want us to move forward and carry on with life.  I don’t believe that they would want us to forever mourn their death, feeling guilty that we’re still alive while they are not.  I believe that they would have want us to remember happier times with them, and to cherish the time that we were able to spend with them while with us here on Earth.  I believe that life should be celebrated, and regardless of the death of one’s loved one, it should not be perpetually mourned.

My father was not one of “those” people.  His unexpected passing on Valentine’s Day, 2008, reached down and shook my core.  It was a wake up call of sorts that I should have heeded long, long ago.  You see, I always believed that my father would live forever, and I took him for granted.  I never believed that his life would just end so abruptly, leaving me to regret things I never said that I should have told him, and just leaving me with a feeling of rawness that I had never experienced.  I didn’t like that feeling.  However, knowing my father, I knew that he would not want me to feel guilty.  I believed that he knew what was in my heart, that he knew that I never meant to hurt him with my callousness, that I loved him dearly, and I knew that he loved me.

My father had suffered from leukemia since 2004.  I never believed that diagnosis.  Don’t ask me why … call it my defense mechanism or whatever you want to call it, I just couldn’t fathom it.  I guess I just wanted it to go away.  It’s funny for me as a nurse to say that … I know that things don’t just go away and disappear.   This didn’t.  It wouldn’t.  It stayed.  For four years, my father fought the good fight.  He learned this disease inside and out.  He asked questions of all his doctors, all his friends who were doctors, anyone who had the same disease or similar.  He researched.  When he died, and we were going through his belongings, I saw all of his handwritten notes, highlighted articles, collected lab results, doctors findings … and it made me sad that he fought so hard and lost.

When the opportunity arose to enter a lottery to run a marathon shortly after he died, I only entered because never in a million years did I think I would be one of the chosen.  As my father did, I played the lottery every week, sometimes twice a week, for years and I had never won.  I thought I would only enter the lottery for the half-marathon, but my husband, who knows me so well, stated that I would finish the half and say that I could’ve run the full thing.  So, I placed my name in the full marathon lottery.  Imagine my surpise when I received the email that stated, “Congratulations!  You have been selected to run!”  What the heck?  I laughed!  What else could I do?  I just laughed because there was nothing that I could do about it now, I was selected.  Not being one to shirk off a challenge that I had gotten myself into, I would run it!  When I learned that it was a marathon benefiting the Leukemia Lymphoma Society, I knew that it was a sign.

My father had always know that I had a passion for running.  As a high school track and cross-country runner, I can remember him cheering me on in the stands.  I knew he was proud of me because I heard how he spoke of me to his friends and relatives.  He believed in me.  So when this opportunity to run the Nike Womens Marathon, Benefiting The Leukemia Lymphoma Society arose, I knew that I would rise to the occasion and run for my beloved father.  I had a sinking feeling that my father had much to do with my name being selected to run …  remember, he knew my passion, believed that I was strong,  and he always wanted me to win the lottery!

For a third year now, I am honored to once again run for my father.  As I have said time and time again, running a marathon is definately much easier than the fight that he was up against with leukemia.  I believe that my father would not want others to suffer as he had, and I will help as best as I can to raise funds and awarness. 

Thank you, Dad, for waking me up.  Know that your passing was not in vain, and that I will fight hard to raise awarness and funds for the Leukemia Lymphoma Society.  I love you, and I miss you.